Forgiveness

TOUGH TOPIC ALERT!!!!

Really God do I have to write about this? His answer was very clear, "YES." A week ago I sat in my room, with many thoughts racing in my head all centered on one thing...forgiveness. The reason why, was because I have had to ask for forgiveness from people recently. As I look joyfully into my last year serving at BG, I cannot help but think about all the changes that go into this. As a reader turns the page of a book to start a new chapter, I feel like I am 10 pages to the end of a chapter. Recently I had feelings of not wanting to read anymore pages to prolong the end, but that is not what God is calling me to do. He is calling me to "read," and "read" well! In doing that though I cannot help but think about the changes that go into a new chapter. The Lord has led my heart to "living together" with those in my path. In doing this, you have to put yourself out there. You need to live honestly and openly for it to work. But in doing this I have discovered that there are things in my life that I do not want to live openly about. There are things from my past that I have held on so tightly to that they have shaped the way that I see things. Here is the thing, living with a tight grip on hurt from the past, only makes your future a little more tainted. You cannot fully embrace the path in front of you if your hand is reaching behind you holding tightly to something from 5 or 10 years prior. At some point in time there is a big distance between you and the hurt that it your hand causes your whole body to turn around see that the hurt from your past is inhibiting you from truly living in the joy of your future. This is where forgiveness comes in.

Seeking out forgiveness, is not easy. It is humbling and down right painful, but the end result is a fuller, richer life with those the Lord places in your path. Forgiveness is so important, that it is what Jesus taught. "He went into all the country around the Jordan preaching a baptism of repentance for the forgiveness of sins." (Luke 3:3) Forgiveness was so important to Jesus that it is what he taught about wherever he went. He wanted people to live without holding on to the past and put focus on what is ahead of us.

Forgiveness is two fold. First you need to seek out forgiveness to those you have wronged. You need to go to them in love and humility and see their forgiveness. Just as Christ forgave us, we also ought to seek out forgiveness from those we have wronged. "Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another as Christ forgave you." (Ephesians 4:32). Second, you need to forgive those in your path that have wronged you. Paul says it this way in 2 Corinthians 2:7-8, "Now instead, you ought to forgive and comfort him so that he will not be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow. I urge you, therefore to reaffirm your love for him." Paul URGES us to not only forgive, but then love. Loving those around us is not an act Christ takes lightly. Our love is what shows him the true desire of our heart.

In Luke 7, we read the story of Jesus at a Pharisee's house and as he was sitting at the table he was anointed by a sinful women. As everyone in the room stood appalled that she came into their party, Jesus looked at her and said, "Therefore I tell you her many sins have been forgiven as her great love has shown. But whoever has been forgiven little loves little." (Luke 7:47). The NIV version says, "she loved much." Jesus forgave her because of how she loved. May we all love much so that forgiveness is the thread of our relationships with others.

A week ago I was talking with a very wise friend about forgiveness. She said something that has become a truth I haven't forgotten. "Grudges are what fuels us when the caffeine runs out." Isn't that the truth. There is a part of us that loves to hold on to our hurts. That part is sin. We want to let others know that we have been hurt and that they should feel sorry for us. Some of us love to just feel like a victim. But here the truth we all need to cling to, God did not create us to be a victim. He created us to be a warrior for him. he created us to go into the battles of life and boldly share his forgiveness. If we are holding onto an old grudge, there is no way we can full fight for God's kingdom. We are not fully affective for him if we are fueled by the things of our past. To me grudges are darkness, I know this because when I hold onto my own grudges, I feel dark. But as the Word says, "This is the message we have heard rom him and declared to you: God is light and in him there is no darkness at all" (1 John 1:5.) In God there is no darkness, which means if God doesn't have grudges we also should not have grudges. We shouldn't hold no to the hurts, because God doesn't hold on to the hurt that we cause him. God wants so desperately to have us live in His light.

His forgiveness for us, is woven into a huge comforting blanket that we can wrap ourselves up in.   But if are holding onto grudges, there are holes in the blanket not because of His lack of love, but because our lack of receiving it fully. Listen to Jesus words as he hung on the cross, waiting for God to take him up to glory, "Father forgive them for they do not know what they are doing" (Luke 23:34.)  Jesus looked out over the people that beat him and nailed him to a cross and pleaded for God to forgive them. As people living with sin in our lives, our grudges are keeping Christ on the cross.

I have written and rewritten this blog over and over for the past week. Ultimately I could not post it until I walked through this myself. I have had to seek forgiveness from others as well as seek forgiveness from God. I write this to not "show off" but to say I understand and am journeying this path with you too. Each day I pray more and more that the Lord shows me His face and I can let go of the grudges in my past and openly place my hands before him asking him to use me wherever he wants me to go. I deeply desire to be wrapped up in God's arm blanket that has no holes in it because of my doubt and the grudges I hold onto.

Take the step friends. Ask God what is in your heart that you need to let go of. After he reveals it, go and act. Do not hold it to yourself. Let go of the hurt and "love much."