thank you

I just want to thank you all for your prayers over the past few days. I have enjoyed reading all your notes of encouragement and have really seen God speak through you. Being in Africa has made me realize what matters in life...relationships. Thank you all.


The decision I had to make was when I will be coming home. Last week, I wrote a post saying that I would be home by August due to my job change at Beautiful Gate. I thought it was a good plan, I would serve here for 4 months and then go home and speak about BG and the program I am working on to as many churches as possible. I was really looking forward to it and felt complete peace about it.


But then came 3 emails from people I love and trust saying that they were disappointed in me for changing the date. They wanted me to consider what God wanted to show me during the last 2 months of my stay here. They wanted me to think of all the people that trusted me and gave money for me to serve IN Africa for 6 months and what leaving would do to my reputation. Above all, they wanted me to just sit and think for a while. So I told them I would wait on it for a week and see what happened.


Well the week has come and gone and I have done some BIG wrestling with God. First I lived in the decision that I was coming home by August for 4 days. I wanted to see how it felt and see if it was really from God or not. Then I lived 4 days in the decision to stay and go home in October, hoping BG would be able to find something for me to do that would fill my days here. During each of those days I lived in the moment. I tried not to focus on my end date, but the day I was living in. I served the people at BG, I explored a lot of Lesotho (from the hatchback of a Toyota) and loved on a lot of children. During those days I sought out the advice of people I trust back home and people I have met here at BG. Hearing each of their feelings was very good for me, but hearing from God is what I wanted most of all. After sitting on the decision for 9 days now I have peace about what to do.


I will be coming home by August. When I wanted to serve at BG I wanted my time here to be beneficial for them. I want to get my hands dirty for God's kingdom work. After talking with Ray, the biggest need for me, would be to get the word out about the "Sponsor a House" program I am starting. The program is replacing the "Sponsor a Cot" program. BG has had huge success in the old program, but in the last few years has had some major issues with it that caused them to look at it in a different way. My role is to make the changes, set it up, train someone here to continue it and then get the word out to as many churches or organizations I can.


Could BG find something for me to do until October and then I speak then? Yes, but I don't feel it would be right. Since October of last year, BG has changed the way they run things in the baby houses. Because of these changes, the need for long term volunteers has become less and less. BG has done a great thing by training local women to really care for the children here. Because of this, they are seeing less and less attachment issues with the children and they are seeing the women take pride in what they are doing and raise these children as their own. They are learning skills like cooking, sewing and how to really care for a child. It really is a "win win" situation.


BG still loves short term volunteers (2-4weeks) because it gives the ladies a little break and allows outsiders to see Lesotho and BG. I don't want to deter anyone from coming here to serve. It is a great place. I am loving my time here. The people of Lesotho are beautiful. They care about each other and are united with one goal of taking care of God's precious children. I believe everyone should come here at least once in their life.


This decision was a very hard one to make. But when I laid out the "pros and cons" the main "pro" for staying until October was to not let people down back home. Yesterday, my devotions said, "Your fear about displeasing other people, puts you in bondage with them and they become your primary focus." That is so true. When thinking about staying until October, all I could think about was how others would be so proud of me. When I thought about leaving by August, I had peace that God would be proud of me. I am not sure why, but I feel God wants me home earlier and I am going to be faithful to that. I don't want my primary focus here to be about other people, I want my primary focus to be about pleasing God.


All the money that was raised for my last 2 months, will be given mostly to BG. Plus I want to bless a family I have meet here that is in need. I thank you all so much for your financial support and would never want any of you to think I was stealing the money you gave to God. It is His, not mine and I am leaving it in Lesotho.


I am VERY grateful for the 3 people who sent emails asking me to think about my choice. They were looking out for my best interest, and were only trying to help me. I am not mad or upset at them, but very grateful that they asked me to take more time. Because in taking the additional time, I know without a shadow of a doubt that coming home by August is what is right. So to those 3 people, I thank you and I love you. I pray that every person has people in their lives that are honest with them, even if the honesty hurts and makes you feel like you have been run over by a truck. Honesty with one another is how God calls us to live. We need to help each other look at the bigger picture in life, rather than the moment you are currently living in.


I have a plane ticket reserved, that I will be finalizing this week. When I know all the details, I will post them. I would love to see you all at the airport when I get home.


Thank you again for your prayers and love. We are called to be one body, to carry each other when times are rough. I am seeing Hebrews 10:19-25 in each of you.


"Therefore brothers, since we have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the blood of Jesus, by a new and living way opened for us through the curtain, that is his body and since we have a great high priest over the house of God, let us draw near to each other in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another and all the more as we see the Day approaching."